Lots has happened. I can't possibly document all my emotions, all that I feel, all that passes through my life every single day. Not for lack of trying, but simply because it is too much to contain within the frail wire-frames of letters and words.

Recently, I've found that I can lose myself when I shut my eyes. I can discover new worlds of light behind the soft red of closed eyelids, I can replay memories with such accuracy that I can almost taste them, feel them. And when I combine these with music, especially Nina Simone's.. silken voice... I can forget where I am, forget who I am and it is the most incredible high I've ever experienced. And what is beautiful about this kind of letting go, is not knowing whether you'll always be able to do it.

Here's to Nina Simone, here's to losing yourself and may be, just may be, finding something beautiful along the way.

From Black Gold, 1970
"We are recording tonight and because we are recording tonight, we are trying to do something... things that actually, that, I'm too tired to do.
But we'll..
But as Faye Dunaway, I think it was, she said, when Bonnie and Clyde came out and all, she said she tried to give people what they wanted.

That's a mistake, really, I know. You can't do it, but only after.. You use up everything you got trying to give everybody what they want.

But I will learn my lesson soon and then you will buy more records, right, because you'll want to see me.

Let's see what we can do with this lovely, lovely thing..
That goes past all racial conflict.. and all kinds of conflict.

It is a reflective tune.

At some time in your life, you will have occasion to say, 'What is this thing called time?'
You know, 'What.. what is that?'

The clock. You go to work by the clock, you get your martini in the afternoon by the clock.. and your coffee by the clock.. and you get on a plane at a certain time and arrive at a certain time.. and it goes on and on and on.

And time is a dictator as we know it.
Where does it go?
What does it do?
Most of all, is it alive?

It is a thing that we cannot touch and is it alive?

And then, one day you look in the mirror.
'How old.'
And you say, 'Where did the time go?'
We'll leave you with that one."

Across the evening sky, all the birds are leaving
But how can they know it's time for them to go?
Before the winter fire, I will still be dreaming
I have no thought of time

For who knows where the time goes?
Who knows where the time goes?

Blink. Pause. Explode.

History makes a strange sound when it is being written. It is the sound of hundreds of throats screaming in unison. It is the sound of thousands of hands clapping and waving. It is the sound of billions of feet running madly, till they pump battery acid. It is the adrenaline rush, the collective gasp of a nation. It can be the stench of defeat, or the smell of victory.

Never before have I seen an entire skyline break out into fireworks, perfectly synchronised. An event organised by the striking of the last ball, the running of the last pace. A show orchestrated by the gods of a sport, the gods of a religion, the gods of billions of TV sets in a country of innumerable unrealised dreams.

Never before I have seen people pouring out into the streets, embracing strangers, singing their hearts out, dancing till their feet drummed a staccato beat echoing from every corner of the city.

People were happy. Just so happy. They were playing anything that was vaguely musical. Anything to dance to, sing along to.

Everybody was somebody. Everybody had an identity. The mob had a face. The mob had faces.
The mob was in love.

Have you ever seen an entire country fall madly in love all at once?

Maybe this is what war feels like.
Or revolution.

I, I will be king
And you, you will be queen
Though nothing, nothing will drive them away
We can be Heroes, just for one day
We can be us, just for one day

I, I remember standing, by the wall
And the guns, shot above our heads
And we kissed, as though nothing could fall
And the shame, was on the other side
Oh we can beat them, for ever and ever

Then we could be Heroes, just for one day.